


Altered Trajectory

by BlueDiamondAvatar



Category: Star Trek: Picard
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Gen, Genderfluid Character, Idiots in Love, Minor Character Death, Non-Canonical Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-03
Updated: 2020-03-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:56:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22995073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueDiamondAvatar/pseuds/BlueDiamondAvatar
Summary: An alternate version of Season 1, Episode 6, skipping the eponymous "Impossible Box"Elnor and Soji get more time to get to know each other, and Narek gets the end he deserves.
Relationships: Soji Asha/Elnor (Star Trek)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	Altered Trajectory

**Author's Note:**

> Imagine if Picard was actually half as smart as everyone pretends he is. He realizes Elnor is a Romulan citizen, who can be teleported into Romulan space whenever without setting off alarms. Then he realizes it would be super helpful if Elnor could be teleported to wherever Dr. Asha is, once Hugh helps Picard locate her.
> 
> Thus Elnor is able to keep Narek from whisking Soji off to the heavily warded meditation chambers, and their flight from the Tal Shiar troops is not quite so panicked.

Everything I own is three years old. Just barely over three years old. How can this be happening? Nothing makes sense.

What else? What else do I have I can test? Is there anything that isn’t faked? Is there anything about me that’s real? 

The pictures - I could have just printed them out recently. Right? Wait. I remember looking at this picture of me and Dahj as children the day we graduated from college. 

And then there’s my cuddlebug. I run my hand over the furry plush. I’ve always had this toy. It’s even in my dreams of childhood. In the pictures. I never would have let someone replace it with a copy. Did someone take all my stuff and leave me replicated fakes three years ago? Everything?!? Even my necklace?

I pinch my arm, my wrist, my hand. I’m flesh and blood. I feel pain. Is that real? I don’t know anymore.

A song starts up in my mind. 

_Anymore, I don’t know who to fight anymore  
I don’t know what is right anymore, Anymore._

I used to play that on repeat, back when Dahj and I were teens. She hated it, called the music whiny and overwrought. I loved the drama, the confusion.

I’m not loving the confusion right now. Was I ever really a teenager? Is my memory of this song even real? Narek says I was never really on that ship from Earth. The ship I remember traveling on.

And how did I suddenly know all those details about the Sheanor the other day?

Someone is knocking on my door.

“Go away!” Nothing to see here, just a young woman having a mental breakdown. I don’t want anyone to see me like this. I look around the room, all my belongings scattered every which way.

“Dr. Asha?” An unfamiliar Romulan voice calls out. “You are in danger; please can we talk?”

I’m in danger. Sure, I can believe that. Danger of deserving to be put in psychiatric observation, just like Ramdha and the other disordered Romulans the Borg attempted to assimilate.

The knock becomes more insistent. 

“I don’t want to see anyone. Please go away.” I try to sound calmer. I sit down on my bed and take big deep breaths.

“Hugh and Picard will be here soon; we need to get you out of here. It isn’t safe. Please let me in, and I can explain.” The voice is pleading with me in a lilting contralto than tells me nothing about who is on the other side.

“Hugh? Hugh sent you?” my mind catches on the familiar name. The xB Director has always been kind to me. Maybe I should let his friend in? I move my fingers in an abrupt gesture, and open my door.

A young Romulan steps into the room. Handsome, with high-cheek bones on a smooth face, flowing long black hair, clear dark brown eyes, simple black-robed attire, and a sword handle rising over their shoulder. Everything about them is obvious and blunt, even though I can’t quite place their gender. Their gaze sweeps around the room taking in my scattered belongings and reflecting confusion and worry. 

Before either of us can say a word, I spot Narek hurrying towards my room. He breaks into a jog when he sees my door open.

The contrast between Narek and my other visitor is stark, even though they are both Romulans. Narek’s layered clothing of various textures makes it hard to describe what he is wearing. Is that a jacket, a sweater, a shirt? Is it paired with pants, or is it all one jumpsuit? Are his boots ankle height or knee high? His curling messy hair and beard conceal his expressions. It suddenly occurs to me that I’m not even sure what color his eyes are, because they are always hidden in shadows. 

“Soji! Are you alright? I have good news.” Narek skids to a halt just inside my doorway.

My other visitor turns around, and takes a few steps back, placing themselves between me and Narek. “She didn’t invite you in, state your business,” the unknown Romulan declares pre-emptively.

“Oh, she’s done a lot more than invite me into her bedchamber,” Narek crosses his arms and leans against my doorway. “I’m her boyfriend, who are you?”

“I’m Elnor of the Qowat Milat.” The handsome Romulan answers briskly, then looks at me over their shoulder, “Is what he says true?” 

“Seriously Narek, _this_ is the one time you aren’t maddeningly elusive and coy?” I blush, and for some reason Elnor is blushing, too. 

Narek smirks, and holds out his hand, “Come, Soji. I’ve made arrangements for the thing we discussed earlier,” he glares at the other Romulan as if it’s their fault he’s being so secretive.

“The meditation? I…I’m not ready. And..Hugh is coming to talk to me.” I’m already reeling from realizing everything I own is only three years old, and that I can’t stay awake while talking to Mom. But a chance for an outsider to perform the Zhal Makh is rare, and it seems to be my best bet at figuring out what’s going on.

“Hugh? But surely you can talk to Hugh later? When we’ve gotten this figured out? I take it the talk with your Mom didn’t help?” Narek is still holding out his hand, beckoning me to his side, but he spares a glance to sneer at the state of my room.

“Well,” I take a step towards Narek, “I do want to understand who I am.”

“Stop, please. You don’t need this bastard Tal Shiar or that crazy Zhal Makh to tell you who you are. I can tell you.” Elnor entreats me while turning around. 

“You know who I am?” I stare incredulously.

“You are Dr. Soji Asha. You are a synth hidden in the body of a human. You’ve been given some false memories, to help you fit in with other people. But you are the daughter of Commander Data, a decorated Starfleet officer, who was a friend to both Hugh and Admiral Picard. The Tal Shiar fear you and they have already murdered your sister, Dhaj. And you are the most beautiful person I’ve ever laid eyes on.” Elnor’s words shatter everything I’ve ever known about myself, but then build me back up, reminding me I still have a past, even if it is unknown to me right now. 

I blink and stare at Elnor while I attempt to process everything. My eyes glance to Narek, and see that he is glaring and practically growling at Elnor. “You knew, didn’t you? That’s why you’ve been watching me. You ARE Tal Shiar.”

Narek looks back at me in shock, but then his mask returns and his face looks concerned but peaceful. He starts to speak, “This is nonsense…”

“No. Whatever lies you’re about to spin for me, just… No. Don’t even bother.” I’m moving sideways across my room, putting my desk between me and Narek.

It all makes more sense now. If the technology had been improved, it would be easier to make a synth seem like a normal organic person, but they’d still need a cover story to explain where they’d come from. It’s not just my stuff that was created just three years ago, it’s me. 

I grab my cuddlebug from where I’d thrown it on the ground, and hold it close. It’s still the toy I’ve treasured my entire life.

Narek moves deeper into my room, trying to close on me. “Soji, Soji, look at me.” I keep my gaze averted, looking at cuddlebug instead.

Elnor unsheaths his sword, and Narek freezes, eying him.

“Don’t you see this Elnor is lying? He may claim to be Qowat Milat, but that order is all women. And I’m pretty sure he’s not a woman. I don’t know what he’s playing at, but we need to get away from him. Let me help you.” Narek spreads his arms out.

My internal resolve falters. Narek has been an attentive and passionate lover these past few weeks. Could he really have done all those intimate things with me if I was a synth and he was Tal Shiar? And I have read before that Qowat Milat are an all-female order.

“My body may be male, but my soul is Qowat Milat. And you should know, Tal Shiar dog, that my sword has been bound to this woman’s protection. If you want to live, you will put your back against that far wall and get out of her way.” Elnor points in the direction he wants Narek to move.

Narek looks pissed, but he moves back, “Soji, babe, listen to me. Did you hear this guy? His sword is bound to you? He’s just some crazy horndog who’s trying to get you to leave with him.”

At that moment, Artifact Director Hugh rounds a corner and appears in my doorway. On his heels is a pale old human. I feel like I’ve seen this man’s face before. He must be the Admiral Picard whom Elnor had mentioned earlier.

“Soji, thank goodness you’re safe.” Hugh starts, then glares at Narek. “What have you been doing to her you wretched little spy?”

“Me? I’m the one at fault here? He’s the one with the big sword out intimidating everyone.” Narek redirects by pointing at Elnor.

The old man interrupts, “Hugh, this is my companion, Elnor, that I mentioned to you earlier. Elnor, this is Hugh, an old friend of mine, who also happens to be the Director of the Artifact,” Picard waves between Elnor and Hugh, and then walks over towards me. “And you must be Dr. Soji Asha. I’m Admiral Picard. I’m so glad to meet you. I wish there were more time for explanations, but you are in danger. An alert has been set off, and many Romulan soldiers are heading in our direction. We need to leave. Will you come with us?” 

I look around the room at each of the faces looking back at me. I find some reason to believe each of them. 

“Is it true? What Elnor said? That my sister Dhaj is dead?” I ask in stuttering starts, as a pair of tears course down my cheek.

Picard pulls something silver and glittering out of his pocket. “She came to me for help, and all I could do was watch as the Tal Shiar assassinated her. Please, let me help you Soji.” His voice is choked with emotion as he puts her necklace in my hand.

I fight back tears, put the jewelry in my pocket and nod. “Let’s go.”

Picard and I make it most of the way to the entrance, and Elnor starts to follow us.

“Soji! Please, wait! Let me come with you. If it’s true that you are in danger, I want to help.” Narek yells, daring a step towards the exit. Elnor whirls around to block his path.

I turn to look back at Narek. “If, by some miracle, you aren’t Tal Shiar, then how can you possibly help me? Why would I want to drag you into… whatever this is?” I take a step backwards, exiting my room.

“Please, Soji! I love you!” Narek pleads, but I’m already out in the hallway. In the distance I can see the soldiers closing on our position, with disruptors drawn. I can’t risk delaying us any longer.

“No.” I begin turning to run, but even as I do, I notice Narek’s hand emerging from a hidden pocket with a small disruptor of his own. “No!” I yell again, as he lifts it up and takes aim…at me! The lying bastard!

Time dilates and seconds become like minutes. Elnor throws something into the space between me and Narek. It looks like a small throwing star at first, but it grows quickly, morphing into a thin metallic shield. The disruptor fire catches on it, and the star explodes into a cloud of black and red dust.

Elnor closes the distance to Narek, and neatly slices my erstwhile boyfriend's neck with their sword. Narek’s head flies through the air and lands on my old bed. A second later it dissolves into green goo.

Picard and Hugh are both moving down the corridor, yelling at me to run, but I wait until I see Elnor turning, see their face set in grim determination, and their legs pumping into a run. Elnor nods at me, his chin rising in a way that tells me to GO.

I turn and run as fast as I can. 

And suddenly, running as fast as I can go is very, very fast. Elnor can’t keep up with me, and Picard and Hugh keep lagging further and further behind. It slowly dawns on me that this is another sign that I am a synth, just like Elnor said.

Elnor and I are hiding in the shadows near the crossroads between several corridors, while Hugh and Picard catch up. Hugh said something about heading for a borg transmitter that the Romulans won’t be able to block.

“Are you feeling ok? Are you upset?” Elnor asks quietly.

I look at the long-limbed Romulan who has squeezed his lean frame up against mine in a small nook. “I’m not ok. I just found out my sister was murdered. That my memories of my Mom and Dad are fake. And my…lover tried to kill me.”

Elnor looks very sad, “I was hoping you hadn’t noticed which way he aimed. I’m sorry I had to kill him like that. Right in front of you.”

I sigh, “I’m sorry you had to kill him, too.” I think a moment longer, trying to pinpoint my emotions about Narek, “I think I would have preferred to kill him myself, for future reference.” 

Elnor snorts once in silent laughter, and bows his head, “I’ll keep that in mind. Next time we run into a lover of yours who is out to double cross us. Do you think that will happen a lot?” Elnor grins at me, but I can tell he’s also honestly asking me the question.

“Oh no. I’m so done with lying Romulans. I don’t think it will come up.” I look over Elnor’s shoulder and see Hugh and Picard rapidly approaching. Well, rapidly approaching for them.

“You do know that not all Romulans lie, right?” Elnor asks pensively.

I turn back and give him a smile. “Yes. I chose my words carefully, Elnor. I’m pretty sure I could fall for a Romulan dedicated to … what is it called? The Way of Candor? That seems like it could happen pretty easily.” I tuck a piece of hair behind my ear and blush.

Whatever Elnor might have said in response is obliterated by the arrival of Hugh and Picard, and the stomp of soldier’s boots sounding off in the distance.

“Step aside,” Hugh orders the two of us out of our nook, and does something that activates a doorway in the crevice we just vacated.

I suddenly notice I'm still carrying cuddlebug, and then hand it to Elnor, “Take care of this for me, will ya?” I ask casually. 

“With my life, but..why?” Elnor responds.

I walk away without answering, striding up to Picard “I’m pretty sure I’ve activated, Admiral, whatever that means. We’ll go a lot faster if you let me start carrying you. Your choices are piggyback, fireman, or wedding style.” 

Picard’s eyes widen in shock as I close on him. “Piggyback, I think,” he whispers before I make good on my threat to swing him over my shoulder.

I pivot so I’m facing away from him, and put one knee down on the floor. “Okay, one leg on this hip, and arms around my shoulders.” 

Now I’m looking at Elnor, I noticed that they’ve brought cuddlebug up to their nose and have taken a deep breath. When they catch me looking, they tuck cuddlebug under their arm and look away with a blush. But they also have a big smile.

Once Picard is settled on my back, I take off down the next set of corridors, and we are easily able to leave Hugh and Elnor behind.

“So I realize I should be asking you questions about my past right now….but how do you know Elnor?” I start up the conversation with Picard, as we race ahead.

“Oh, I first met him when he was a young orphan. I asked the Qowat Milat on Vashti to take him in, while I sought out a suitable Romulan family to adopt him. But then…. well I was never able to return after the synth uprising on Mars. I know that seems like a strange event to prevent me from returning, but it was a major turning point in Federation and Romulan politics, and my relationship to the Federation in particular.” Picard really knows how to lecture people on history, for better or worse.

I interrupt the Admiral’s ruminations, “So Elnor is…a man, right? I mean he seems a bit feminine at times...”

“Well, truth be told, and he does always tell you the truth…Elnor is just as comfortable with they or them pronouns as with he and him. I just have a hard time adjusting to that, since I knew him as a boy. I think spending so much time in a female-only environment has…well, not changed him precisely, but influenced his gender expression.” As Picard rambles, our two friends catch up again.

Elnor gives us a quizzical look, as Hugh unlocks the next hidden doorway, “What are you two talking about?”

Picard coughs, but I jump right in, “You, of course.” I smile at Elnor, and they smile back at me. “I’ve just been noticing that I think of you as genderfluid, but so far everyone else has referred to you as he or him. Is that okay?”

“Yes. Both are fine, really. It’s kind of complicated to get into right now, but..” Elnor looks at me, and waves me to move through the doorway ahead of them. “I am flattered you noticed.”

“We’re getting close. It will be just a series of doors from here, you might as well put the Admiral back down, Soji.” Hugh informs us as he opens yet another secret door.

We are all startled to hear voices nearby, “Here, we found the next doorway,” a woman cries out in Romulan.

“Damn, they must be able to activate the doorways once I’ve gone through them.” Hugh whispers quietly. We all rush to get through the next few passages quickly, and I start to panic again.

We enter a room that is larger than most, the four of us spilling through a doorway, then waiting for Hugh to seal it behind us.

“The queencell.” Picard whispers.

I look around, and some part of my mind is cataloging the items around us. I suddenly recognize the various Borg technologies scattered around the room. Hugh is activating a ring in the center. “The spatial trajector,” I murmur. Picard looks at me with doubt in his eyes.

“She’s right, Admiral.” Hugh offers. “It’s a Sikarian technology. They were absorbed by the Borg after your time as Locutus. It can allow us to travel up to…” Hugh hesitates as though trying to call up the memory.

“Forty thousand light years.” I remind him. But how do I know that? My heart is racing, and I start to pant again. I hate this feeling, that I don’t even know myself.

Elnor approaches, and hands cuddlebug back to me. I squeeze it to my chest, and look up into their eyes. “You know who you are, Soji, you are exactly the kind of person you want to be. Picard can help you with the fake memories and understanding the rest.” I nod, and my breathing slows back down to normal. 

In the meantime, Hugh and Picard have been figuring out our destination. I overhear Picard speaking to someone on a ship, “Meet us at Nepenthe.”

“OK, one minute and I’ll be able to send the three of you through.” Hugh tells us.

“What you aren’t coming with us?” Picard cries out. At the same time, we hear boots and Romulan voices getting closer.

“Someone needs to stay, shut down the machine, and keep them from tracing your destination.” Hugh shakes his head as he answers.

“How long do you need to keep them away from here?” Elnor asks abruptly.

Hugh looks up at us, a mixture of guilt and fear on his face. “At least four minutes.”

“I’m staying, too, then.” Elnor nods.

“Elnor, No!” Picard sounds as if he is scolding the young Romulan. “You must come with us. I don’t want to be separated from you again.” His hands are trembling as he yells.

“It fills my heart with joy, to hear you say that,” Elnor’s face lights up with fierce delight, “But my oath has bound me to your cause, not your commands. You will both be safer if I stay behind and keep the Tal Shiar away from here.” 

Before they can step away, I grab at Elnor’s arm, “You will survive this, right? And come find us, on Nepenthe?” I feel like my heart is trying to climb right out of my throat.

“No matter where you go, I will find you. Even if it takes a thousand years.” Elnor’s gaze pierces me through. But I can’t help but notice they didn’t answer my questions. 

I lean in to kiss them, but there’s a sudden flash of light. I look over my shoulder, and the portal has activated. 

Picard beckons me, “Come Soji. We must go.” I see the dread and fear written on his face and I hear the unspoken words, _the faster we leave the more hope that Elnor and Hugh will survive this gamble._

I walk to Picard, and hear Hugh opening a door. I look over my shoulder to see Elnor running down a corridor towards the sound of the Romulans breaking through. “Stay back, and choose to live,” they yell.

Then Picard pulls me into the trajector’s eye, and my world dissolves into a white light.

**Author's Note:**

> Song notes:
> 
> Lyrics in italics are from Clipped by MuteMath
> 
> Lyrics that are stolen without being identified in the text are sung by Clannad in the soundtrack to the movie.... 
> 
> Big thanks to Emma, whose comment on my Episode 4 Picard fic got me to stop daydreaming about this and write it up. Comments matter!
> 
> I've watched through episode 8. I'll probably do a second chapter to this timeline at some point. Big open questions are: do I kill Hugh in my version? Anything else folks would like to see changed?


End file.
